Snuggle Time

My favorite time with Tru since the accident is bedtime.  Before I worried about starting a "bad habit" by falling asleep by his side.  In fact, I had worked so hard to slowly ease myself out of his room, first lying by the side of the bed, then by the door, then with my feet in and head out of the door, and finally all the way out of the room.  I will have to start that whole process over again, but for now, I'm enjoying the closeness that snuggle time allows.  Now I have an excuse, so the guilt is gone.  I can just relish the time with my child without judgements.

Last night, he snuggled up close, wrapped his arms around me, and said, "I saved you Mommy!".  When I asked him what he saved me from, he told me "monsters".  Then he said, "I will always protect you, Mommy."  It was a bittersweet moment -a touching sentiment from my only son laced with guilt that I didn't always protect him.