Thursday, November 13, 2008

Now for the emotional healing...

I keep wondering when that will begin.  It's been so difficult for all of us.  Tru still has nightmares, and wants to fall asleep holding my hand.  He says this is so we will "be safe."  It breaks my heart. He is whiney and grumpy most of the time now.    James went back to work, but calls several times a day to check on us.  As for me, well, I can't stop thinking about it.  It runs through my head over and over again -tormenting me.  I can't escape it...even when I sleep, I dream about it.  The sleeping pills aren't even helping anymore.  I know I should be overjoyed that my boy is alive, but for some reason, I still feel sad.  My sadness is mixed with other emotions, too -anger, guilt, fear.  It's overwhelming.

4 comments:

CNH said...

I wonder if there is some sort of support group, online or in person, that is aimed at people with post traumatic stress? I'm so sorry this is so hard. It's sort of like when people tell a woman who's had a very much unwanted c-section "just be thankful you have a live baby". While that, of course, is of great importance, there are more feelings that come than just thankfulness. Acknowledging those feelings and not feeling guilty about having the is important. You will all continue to be in my prayers.

It's my worst fear too.

Kimble-Wood said...

I agree with everything Chantel just said. The emotional healing always takes so much longer than the physical. Don't let anyone make you feel like you should just "get over it" because Tru is home and healing. It'll all come in time. Sending up prayers of strength and healing.

MamaMia said...

Prayers for you and your family, DJ!

Diane said...

I say a prayer everyday for ya'll and think about what happened often. I hope that in due time you will all heal and that Tru continues to heal at the fast rate he already is.